Losers are important too! As much as it feels good to win all the time, someone has to lose as well. This isn’t a bad thing either, it might even be just as important as winning.

The definition of competition is to strive against each other to gain or win something. That’s only the surface layer of what people see, however. It goes much deeper than just putting on a uniform and going through the motions. What people don’t see is the hours and hours of training, sacrifice, perseverance, and dedication. Then, when it’s time to compete you have two teams who work really hard which makes everyone better. That is the ultimate reward. And there’s no better teacher than failure. It shows you the areas you need to improve upon, and it gives you the drive and energy to go get better.

Some people think that labeling kids or teams losers is shameful to the kids and hurts their self-esteem. This can be true, but in most cases it’s the parents’ fault. Sports psychologist Caroline Silby says, “trying to make children win all the time can be harmful. Also, losing is not such a big deal that it should be hushed up. If parents don’t speak about games, or seasons, that ended badly, children may think that means that failure is so awful that they shouldn’t even talk about it.” Also, Silby says, “If parents get angry, blame unskilled players, or dwell on a loss, they ruin the whole point of being on a team: a sense of belonging. Athletes who have that feeling, that they are connected to something larger than themselves, are less stressed and have higher self-esteem. And overall, losing seasons can give athletes some perspective, and help them grow better at managing frustration and doubt.”

There are no participation trophies in life. Let’s stop creating a culture where losing is considered a bad thing. This creates unrealistic realities in the perceptions of children. Losing goes further than just sports and it’s applicable to life as well. Life is hard and everyone will fail at something at some point. Let’s start encouraging each other to do something daring and new. Doing new things usually comes with a little failure along the way. Just understand this is just one step of the process and something better is coming. There can be no flowers without rain.

How losing at sports — even all the time — can be good for kids – The Washington Post